They Don’t Believe in You, Yet They Expect You to Save Them

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Yes, I know that sounds strange. How can someone doubt you, dismiss you, and even dislike you—yet, when life turns against them, they look to you for help? I can use my own family as an example.

They have never supported me. In fact, it took me until my thirties to fully accept that they don’t even like me. And yet, when they needed someone to listen, someone to guide them, someone to save them—I was the first person they called.

The Hypocrisy of Their Need

After my grandmother passed, suddenly, I became the one they all turned to. The very people who doubted me, who never poured into me, who made it clear I wasn’t “going to amount to anything” needed me. They needed my strength, my wisdom, and my presence.

But they will never admit it.

They won’t acknowledge the harm they caused because doing so would mean facing the truth of how they treated me. Instead, they pretend it never happened, hoping I will forget too. Hoping I will put my hands out to pull them up, despite the fact that they were the very ones who tried to tear me down.

I Used to Try to Fit In—Now I Don’t

There was a time when I thought the only way to be part of my family was to prove my worth to them. I overextended myself, thinking if I just gave enough—my time, my energy, my support—they would finally see me.

But I never fit in. And I never will.

And the truth is, I no longer want to.

According to the Bible, Jesus saves even those who have wronged Him. But I do not. What my family did, the choices they made, the way they treated me—has to run its course. I refuse to interfere.

They Dug Pits for Me—But I Climbed Out

Many times, I have found myself digging my way out of the pits they set for me. They wanted to see me fail, yet they always provided a way out.

And now, when they find themselves in their own pits, they want me to pull them out.

They don’t believe in me, but they believe in my strength. They refuse to acknowledge me, but they acknowledge that I am the one who can make things better.

But I won’t.

I refuse to be the savior for those who tried to destroy me.

Let People Lie in the Bed They Made

If you are someone who constantly finds yourself helping those who have never helped you, hear this: You do not have to save them. You do not have to fix what they broke. You do not have to sacrifice yourself for people who would never do the same for you.

Sometimes, the best thing you can do is step back and let life teach them the lessons they refused to learn before.

To anyone struggling with this, I hope you find the strength to walk away and let people figure their own way out.

Because if they never believed in you before, they don’t deserve to believe in your power now.

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