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Alone in the Dark, Volume II Part V: When the Mask Starts Glitching

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Everything the relationship coaches and dating gurus tell you to look for, they have studied. They know the language. They know the traits. They know how to perform decency. They know how to mirror emotional intelligence long enough to secure access. Until they start glitching. That’s the only word that fits. It’s like a program running out of battery. The mask flickers. The tone shifts. The warmth cools. You might think they’re just stressed. Just tired. Just having a bad day. But what’s really happening is this: They’re tired of performing. Tired of pretending. Tired of maintaining the character they built to catch you. And if they have other “supply” lined up, they grow impatient. The discard phase accelerates. The devaluation intensifies. They juggle people the way circus performers juggle pins. They get sloppy sometimes, but their lies are rarely spontaneous. Most are premeditated. It’s a playbook, remember? There’s a general script for every scenario. Unless you start seeing it b...
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Alone in the Dark, Volume II Part IV: Stop Underestimating People

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It takes time to get there, but eventually you do. You stop underestimating people. “I never thought you would do that” are words I used to say often. I don’t say them anymore. Today, I put nothing past anyone. If they can cheat, they can kill you. If they are jealous, they can kill you. If they switch up, there is a reason, and you need to step back long enough to figure it out. You don’t have to announce it. You don’t have to confront them. You just subtly create distance. You learn them enough to know what to say to get away. You take mental notes. You store information not to retaliate, but to connect dots later. Pay attention to their silence when others are celebrating you. Notice how when something good happens for you, they don’t congratulate you. They say words, but never congratulations . Whatever others admire about you? That’s what they target. Their advice never quite makes sense. It feels off. It often sounds hateful, but it’s delivered under the guise of concern. “I’m ju...
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Alone in the Dark, Volume II Part III: Love Bombing, Masks, and the Cycle That Hooks You

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Just because someone does nice things does not mean they are nice people. That is love bombing 101. If you are easily enticed by gestures, they’ve got you. If validation is what you seek, they now know exactly how to hook you. And you need to be very careful with this, because this is how people are conditioned to accept abuse. It starts with excess. Overdoing the nice things. Overcompensating. Making you feel seen, chosen, special. Then comes the explosion. They blow up on you. Hurt you. Cross a line. Afterward, they cry. They apologize. They say they were having a bad day. They insist they never meant to hurt you. They do the thing you like most. You accept the apology. And the cycle begins again. I was beaten so badly once that I cried myself to sleep thinking about how I could take myself out. That night, my body shut down in ways I didn’t understand at the time; I wet the bed. The abuser entered my grandmother’s room to apologize. But by then, something in me had already shifted. ...
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